"The Desperation Out There Is Paranormal"

Song of the Hour: Trouble by Elliott Smith; The Red Walls

I've been a mess this month. Trudging through finals, figuring out how to graduate, waking up and realizing I had like 3 days to do all my Christmas shopping, scrambling to get Joss' gifts together (half of which are already destroyed), going to Kinston to see my brother and his fam (a whole different nightmare), and then helping my dad get ready for a month in China-- it's been busy.

My dad left Friday night, driving to new york with his future (step)son-in-law, and went through a typical  holiday traveling nightmare.  waiting in the airport 6 hours, getting on the plane, some kind of fuel leak, wait another 3 hours in the terminal, get on another plane, the bathrooms don't work or something, get off again, wait for a 3rd plane, get on, leave-- having spent roughly 15 hours on the airport grounds. I think he's at the Great Wall right now, eating holiday fudge made by my godmother. It's soooo surreal I don't quite know what to do with myself. I mean, my dad's in China. Getting married. Does that blow anyone else's mind? It'll take a year for her to move to the states... maybe I'll figure this out by then. Perhaps "My Chinese Step-Mom" will make a good novel.

Christmas dinner at my sister-in-law's grandmother's house was even more traumatizing this year. Oh, in case I didn't mention it, Terry left my brother. By "left" I mean moved in with her mother, who lives across the street. That way my brother can look out the window every few hours at night and see that she doesn't get home until 4 in the morning. I don't think much has been officially filed yet, but it's a matter of time. The boys (12 and 5) are staying with my brother, though they have a time-share going. Christmas morning involved the kids waking up at 8, and my brother insisting that no one open presents until Terry got there. And she showed up at 10. So picture 3 rowdy young boys on Christmas morning having to sit on their hands for 2 hours. It was ugly. Jimmy tried to pass the time by reading the damn nativity story, which of course made it worse. By noon, when we left to go to Terry's grandmother's house, it was tense to say the least.
Terry has like 5 aunts. One of them is the bane of my existence. Loud, outspoken, nosy and domineering. Terry's family gets serious kicks out of what they consider to be subtle sexual innuendo. They literally "rib" each other. They're breathing southern stereotypes, as much as I hate to say it. I've always minded my P's and Q's with these people, because they're not going to go away, you know? But with about 18 people in a 20x20 room, asking my dad about his trip to China and impending marriage, I hear the banal Aunt ask my dad, "You gonna get yourself some sponge baths, Mr. Jimmy? (giggle giggle) This Chinese lady gonna give you some sponge baths?" I snapped. She was maybe 5 feet from me, and I stared at her until she looked at me and I asked, "What the hell is wrong with you?" As much as I HATE making people uncomfortable, I did get a tiny amount of satisfaction watching her squirm and realize that I didn't find her comments appropriate. I ignored her for about an hour, but guilt got to me and I was nice to her the rest of the afternoon. I can only hope there will come a holiday when I don't have to talk to Those People. One year where I don't have to listen to why there needs to be a wall around south Texas, or how a Clinton is an anti-christ. 17 years I've seen these people every goddamn christmas.
Well, at least we didn't have to sing happy birthday to baby jesus this year. No, I'm not kidding.

Brian got me season 1 of MacGyver  for Christmas, and I've been having a lot of fun watching it with Joss. I think he's getting into the science stuff a little bit, which of course makes me happy. He's full of interesting observations-- "Mom, Macgyver kisses a lot of different girls, but he doesn't marry  any of them!" No, sweety, no he doesn't.  I really loved the show when I was little, and it's cool to watch Joss try to figure out exactly what that man is going to do with a bucket, a towel, a swiss army knife, and match to get those gypsies out of prison. It's a kid-friendly show, which is refreshing. There's still violence, but it's manageable.

I've got to see a lot of friends this holiday, though it hasn't been the same without DD. Andy's back from London, I had lunch with Amanda, I got to have lunch with Sara and her fam, and to catch up with Suzy. It's been great. I do wonder what's happened to Chrissy, David K., and Owen-- but I just assume that if they're around they'll let me know.

Andy and I had lunch at my old Waffle house stomping ground. We're half-way into some dissection of the life of Jesus or something, when I happen to get a good look at the cook, and have a freakin' heart attack. Joss' grandmother still works there. My mind shut down for a few minutes. She either didn't see me, didn't recognize me, or didn't acknowledge me-- I don't know. Joss has her eyes-- it's a little scary, really. By the time I worked up the nerve to talk to her, she had left. The doorway to the only half of Joss' medical history I'll ever have, and I can't work up the nerve to talk to her. I don't know if any of you remember her, but she's pretty intimidating. Didn't she threatened to kill me a couple times? I think the last time I spoke her, I had let her babysit an infant Joss. I can't remember what happened after that... I had seen her and she wouldn't talk to me. Damn, this is years ago and my memory is shit. I'm a neurotic mess. I need get over it and just ask her a few questions-- that's not hard, right? The worst that can happen is that she won't talk to me again. I have no idea why I'm so anxious. I just am. Maybe I'll try again this weekend...

As a Joss side note, he has confessed that he is in love with Ms. Miley Cyrus, aka Hanna Montana.

How cute is that?  He says that the age difference (she's 15) won't be a problem. He's very confident. As entertaining as his marrying into the Cyrus family would be, I hope this phase passes soon.

Ok, I'm done. I forgot anything else I was going to tell you.
I'll leave you with some pics, and write again should I remember the rest.

   
usually Joss/Andy rough-housing

My nephews, the matching set.

If I've told you anything about Trent, this one says it all...

My favorite part of this post-grad picture is how Joss' mouth is crammed full of cookies.

Happy New Year!!

Comments

[Andrew]

Unless they were poking each other in the bones that encage the heart and lungs, I'm afraid they were not literally "ribbing" each other. They misuse "literally" a lot over here, and it's becoming a pet peeve. I'm certainly not going to let someone who beats me so ferociously in Scrabble get away with it. :-P

[Jenny]

Sadly Andrew, they were. As in poking one another's ribs with their elbows, in that way of, "did you get my euphemism? because I think it was subtle."
Funny though, because I was just making fun of a psychologist the other day that had said "Britney Spears is literally on a Highway to Hell." It's a good pet peeve-- call me out if I use it incorrectly. i don't want to be that guy.

and it's your turn on scrabble. :)